wordsandbirds:

“Sleep heavily and know that I am here with you. The past is gone, and cannot harm you anymore. And while the future is fast coming for you, it always flinches first, and settles in as the gentle present. This now, this us, we can cope with that. We can do this together you and I.”

— Cecil Baldwin, Welcome to Night Vale.  (via bobbycaputo)

brago:

pops the parasol right out her pussy QUEEN!

vintagehomecollection:

Kitchens, 1997

catgirlkaiju:

butchdreams:

chelfaust:

✦Starry Destinations

print | wallpaper

pocketss:

distressing things to say to your friends

tiltlhat:

TIL, that eating a bowlful of spaghetti straight up filling and tasty Low key

punkitt-is-here:

ca-dmv-bot:

Customer: AYIEH IS MY DAUGHTERS NAME
DMV: HELL YEAH

Verdict: DENIED

birthdaysongs:

hate whenever mfs in horror media are like “what was that noise…” bro you and i both know its creatures

jackalopetrope:

kyacchan-comics:

My contempt towards a brand is directly proportional to how often they interrupt my playlists.

gidianthe:

i’m like a werewolf but instead of turning into a wolf on the night of the full moon i dont do that and i just stay human

mostly-funnytwittertweets:

snoopyboopysoupy:

tumkaafiho:

they’re scared cuz under socialism strap gets you pregrant

ⓘ this post was flagged by fact checkers as truer words never been spoken